D3 body, D1 cock
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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