Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Even my vagina gasped.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
