I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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