I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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