Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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