My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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