everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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