do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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