I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
