Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
