He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I think we might need a safe word for this...
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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