His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
