it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
