I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
