What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
