He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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