He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Brb crying the tears of my youth
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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