I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
