Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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