Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
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Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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