they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize