respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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