girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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