Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
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