Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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