We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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