you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
