you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
