everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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