I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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