yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
