Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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