What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I think I won the penis lottery.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
