I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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