As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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