I cockslap morals
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
