The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.