How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
