Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
