He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i dont even know how to be here
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
