I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
