My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize