it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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