Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
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She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
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