i would punch a child for taco bell
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Randomize
