halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
