it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
