are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
