Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Randomize
Follow @tfln