It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize