ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
