woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
